Thirteen Reasons Why

"Thirteen Reasons Why," by Jay Asher, was a recommendation of my dear friend Sue Harman.  I started it last night and just finished it- -all 288 pages of it.  I'm nearly speechless, honestly.  What a book!  Wow.  I'm just staring at my keyboard- -fingers hovering over the keys- -trying to anchor down the thoughts that the story provoked.

First, as I began reading, my thought was, "I'm so glad I'm not in high school anymore!"  The drama and the competition are two things I've lived happily without.  But as I continued to read, my thoughts reflected back on the people like Hannah Baker who were longing for friendship.  For acceptance.  For love.  Was I nice to them?  Did I help them?  Or would I have been one of their "13?"  I was a very fortunate teenager.  Several great friends, teammates, teachers, boyfriends, family, etc.  Really, I don't remember ever being dissatisfied with my social/people life.  Ever.  I never had a reason to want for anything.  Sure, there was drama.  I don't think any person escapes teenage years without their share of drama.  But never for a moment did I have reason to question whether I belonged- -whether I was loved.   

The story of Hannah Baker makes my heart hurt.  I would hesitate to allow my children to read it (that's how I determine whether a book is worthy of adding to my library) for certain thematic reasons.  But at the same time, I realize her story is real in the lives of many girls and boys, and I would want my children to understand a little of what those kids are going through so they could be of help, somehow.  How can we help them if we don't understand them?  If we don't even try? 

Am I making any sense?

It was a great book- -very thought provoking.  It really made me think about my actions and how even the most seemingly-non-affective decisions I make everyday really do affect others.  I will definitely think twice about how I treat people in the future.  I will reach out, even when it's uncomfortable or inconvenient.  I will smile, and mean it- -especially to people who seem unhappy.  I will be better about looking for the good in people and praising them.  I won't gossip or take rumors for fact.  I will replace judgemental thoughts with accepting ones.  I will try harder to lift others up- -in any way I can.

In memory of every "Hannah Baker" that never made it past the teenage years.  One in particular- -whom I love and miss very much.  I'm sorry I didn't reach out when I could have.